This hits home to my family and me… but I thought it was hysterically subversive. Check it out here.
[Disclaimer: If you're offended by mildly crude humor and some foul language just move on. I'm telling you now. If you watch and are offended and aghast at my linking to the clip you are without excuse.]
A good friend of mine died yesterday. I am unable to make it to give her eulogy, but was able to write up something that will be read tomorrow. Below is what I wrote.
Pray for the friends and family. Rene, this if for you.
Rene wanted me here with all of you to celebrate her life and it pains me that I can’t make it. Yet I believe she would understand. She was one of the most gracious and encouraging people I’ve met.
Nothing can be said to change these circumstances or make the pain of her loss better, so I will avoid trying with my words to do so. To the friends and family of Rene who hurt, all I can say is allow God to experience it with you. Invite him into your pain and he will enter.
Rene understood this more than most, I think. She lost her son Brandon several years ago, unexpectedly and tragically. Then she lost her beloved Jim a few years after that. She was no stranger to pain. But that didn’t mean she was a stranger to God. Pain and God often and tearfully intertwine, and Rene embodied this bittersweet marriage.
Because of this and from what I know of her she still embraced life, even through heartbreak and brokenness. She understood that when God and pain dance together life will always ask to cut in.
Death does not have the final say. Pain cannot dominate us. When God steps into the experiences of death and the valleys of our pain life emerges as the consuming presence and ultimate reality.
So today isn’t about Rene’s death as much as it is about her life. Not just her life before her death but her life now. Yes… her life now. Even living within range of death’s putrid breath, Rene’s calmed and assured life echoed the mocking tone of Paul’s question, “O death, where is your sting?”
And though she has left the stage of earth, I can imagine her now, along with Jim and Brandon, chanting the chorus of resurrection, with fists in the air, defying death to make a move. “O death, where is your sting? Where is your victory? Bring it on for we have life and his name is Jesus!”
And just as she did many times through her tears on earth, let that chant march you through the mourning of this life until morning breaks on the next.
To know me requires a great deal of patience and frustration. I have a sordid history of an inability to really decide something or figure out what I want to do. So…
The blog. What to do?
Maybe, after talking to some friends, some of the things on here are useful. But don’t expect daily entries. Maybe a post a week.
Maybe.
The best thing to do is subscribe to the RSS feed and it will tell you when I post something.
God bless.
Not going to get into it much… but I’m planning on shutting down the blog.
1. there is too much ego and self-promotion involved.
2. there is too much self-imposed deadlines and pressure.
I will continue to write but not through a personal blog. Thanks to those who commented and read.
My aim and intention is to try and write 2-3 good posts a week. It may end up like 2 because I’m lazy when it comes to writing.
Thanks for all the comments, etc.
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Working up a sermon on friendship to Jesus. Share what friendship means to you. How has it impacted your life?
It often happens when I’m in conversation about the current economical situation, the plight of the poor or the demise of the oppressed that someone in a smarmy tone begins to offer his/her advice to the people group we’re discussing. “Well,” Mr. or Mrs. Smarmy adds, “these folks should realize all the help that is out there for them. They can get grants for school and stuff like that. If they want help they can find it.”
I’m not against offering advice and tough-love admonitions to those in desperate situations or in a financial quagmire. I’m for lending a hand-up instead of giving a handout. Seeing people freed from their dependancy of welfare would delight me to the core. I constantly wrestle with discerning the best ways to assist and bring hope to the poor and marginalized in society. And I think some who unnecessarily gobble up government assistance need to hear a stern word of rebuke on occasion.
So why cringe at the contributions of Mr. or Mrs. Smarmy? Here’s why. Their advice, and perhaps decent advice, never reaches the ears of those who most need to hear it. Often they don’t know the poor of the community as individuals with stories. They merely observe and critique them as a categorized group. Honestly, such smug sound-bites often comes across in conversation as rhetorical devices meant to elevate one’s sense or perception of self-worth. Can’t you see how I’m doing and how well I have my business in order?
Gag.
This shot-into-the-darkness self-serving advice is wasted on the nerves of an inner ear that sends signals to my brain that gets what is being said and agrees already (and has agreed a thousand times before that). Without intending to lather on the smarm (not a word but it works), let me say that I don’t need to hear that particular advice. But some of my friends would certainly gain footing through your experiences and wisdom. Mr./Mrs. Smarmy, why don’t you let me introduce you to them?
No? Ok. Why waste words then?
From what I can tell an unwillingness to relationally engage the poor and marginalized by those with the answers erects the greatest barrier to getting a grip on the economical plight of some. I have no doubt that many of the ideas and advice on the tongues of Mr. and Mrs. Smarmys everywhere would benefit those needing to hear it. The offering and acceptance of advice between the groups would, perhaps, move communities toward closing the gap between the well-off and poor. The exchange within these intentional relationships would start the process moving forward. Maybe, some would begin seeing better days ahead.
And maybe not. I suspect we’ll never know until the categories disintegrate and people from every social strata take time to get to know one another.
Maybe the first step to any systemic economical change would be an icebreaker game.
I hope that everyone has enjoyed the holiday season. I must say that for my family and few of my friends a few challenging circumstances on the road this season presented opportunities for growth (interpreted muffled fits of cussing). All the same, life happens and we must live it.
Recently, my wife and I have engaged heated and fearful discussions regarding some of our perplexing and complicated financial realities (this isn’t a plea for help, just an honest assessment of how it is). These soulful conversations have forced both of us to revisit the importance of simple living.
We recognize that some of our financial difficulties exist due to things outside our control, but other problems are the direct result of our own bad decisions. In several ways certain aspects of our life together have spun out of control in a whirl of felt-needs and consumeristic impulses. I have little doubt these decisions compile the complexity and drama of our economic situation.
At the start, I’m foggy on the exact nature of these culprits and I’m writing and assessing things at the gut level. Intuitively I long for a simplistic way of life and believe that such a life centers itself in the heart of God’s kingdom.
I’ll continue to explore and unpack these feelings through the year to see if anything emerges that is helpful and beneficial. I hope to engage God’s story in a way that will offer some insight. I’ll seek to understand if there is a deeper, but simpler, level at which to live the way of Jesus in the midst of a culture that seemingly imprisons people in an economic fun-house with no exits. It won’t be the only discussion kicked around on the blog in the coming year but a dominant one.
Join me on this journey toward simplicity in 2010.
Happy New Year, folks!